"POLITICS AND OTHER MISTAKES"
Do nothing till you hear from me
By Al Diamon
Here's how the Legislature works.Mostly, it doesn't.
What's weird is, that's a good thing. The Legislature is, by design, a mess. The drafters of the Maine Constitution made it that way on purpose, because they were afraid that if the legislative branch of government turned out to be an efficient, lawmaking machine, it would approve a lot of really bad stuff.
Like accidentally legalizing slot machines in bars (since repealed).
Or instituting a mandatory car-emission testing program (since repealed).
Or approving the merger that created the Department of Health and Human Services (care to go for three in a row?).
So, the state's Founding Fathers set up a clumsy system, making it difficult (although, obviously, not impossible) for whatever assortment of clunkheads ended up in the state House or Senate to do stupid things.
The Constitution also clearly states that the Legislature is just a prosthetic device attached to the withered appendage of the public's will. In Article Four, Part One, Section One, Subbasement Two, it says, "[T]he people reserve to themselves power to propose laws and to enact or reject the same at the polls independent of the Legislature, and also reserve power at their own option to approve or reject at the polls any Act, bill, resolve or resolution passed by … the Legislature."
This passage means governing is not up to the idiots who get elected, but to the idiots who do the electing. Which protects us from our elected representatives, but not ourselves.
Still, there are always reformers who want to make the Legislature more "efficient." They claim the House and Senate should be smaller. Making government less representative. They enact term limits. Causing legislators to be less experienced. They push through public campaign funding. Creating a Legislature less beholden to "special interests," which is a fancy way of saying "us."
Sportsman's Alliance of Maine Executive Director George Smith griped in a recent newspaper column that he was "bored by the glacial pace of the legislative process and worried about the lack of time most legislators have to devote to the substantial issues of such importance to our state."
Smith's problems are easily solved. He should bring an iPod to public hearings, so he won't have to listen. And he should be thankful that most legislators couldn't locate the state's substantial issues with GPS and a registered Maine Guide. Allowing lawmakers to deal with healthcare, the budget or taxes by passing laws is like letting an eight-year-old solve the neighborhood bully problem with a loaded revolver.
Except the eight-year-old would behave more responsibly.
Legislators are doing what they're equipped to do. Nothing. Asking them to take on more complex tasks only reduces their entertainment value. Where else can you see alleged adults debating a proposed law defining shade trees? Or trying to find a way to give themselves a pay hike without the taxpayers noticing? Or considering a bill declaring May 1 "Cold War Day?" Or one creating a Maine Department of Peace? Or the designation of an official state spider? Or a ban on oldies-but-goodies bands that don't contain any original members? Or imposing new controls on the transport of chicken poop? Or renaming Aroostook County in honor of state Sen. Ethan Strimling of Portland?
These actual measures (except the one I made up) will occupy all of our legislators' time until June adjournment (uh, it's possible I made up two), thereby leaving our healthcare, taxes and budget unmolested. Because allowing them to fiddle with that stuff almost always results in things getting worse.
Take bond issues, for example. The Legislature has decided the state needs to borrow nearly $300 million to pay for research and development (admit it, you have no clue what that is or why it requires so much money), roads and bridges, higher education, public lands, arts and culture, habitat for the official state spider and new name signs for Strimling County.
Over the next two years, that amounts to about twice as much new debt as old bonds being retired. We'll be deeper in the red, with nothing to show for it.
Except a healthier spider population. Unless that's one of the bills I made up.
The Constitution requires that these bonds go before voters - as noted above, the public is supposed to be the real power in this state - but that rarely results in any rejections. To make sure that trend continues, a political action committee called Save the Spiders is already being formed.
If either legislators or voters played to their strength - doing nothing - the state's entire bonded debt would disappear in about 10 years. Even conceding we need to borrow to maintain our transportation system, Maine could still be debt-free in less than two decades.
The next time you hear somebody complain about the do-nothing Legislature, remember this: Inaction works.
Don't just sit there. Do something. E-mail me at aldiamon@herniahill.net.
